im dirt poor will suck dick for halloween costume
I figured it out. hungover me hates drunk me, drunk me hates sober me, and sober me hates being sober. so yes, were blacking out tonight.
Chapter 6 - how to lose your underwear in chicago
Maybe he meant to say like I love fucking you? But just forgot the fucking part.. That's what I'm telling myself.
I woke up with no pants, someone elses shirt, but my new years crown still on. That is dedication.
He leaned over in the middle of the movie and said "My dick's name is Juan". WHO DOES THAT?
Just you wait I'll be crying and puking everywhere in no time
Go forth Daniel, drink, be merry... And meet some hot Asians for your friends to bang
Question. Was fucking Laura an entirely regrettable decision?
like...quickly.
Personally, I'm gonna be Sexy Dobby the House Elf.
We drunkenly made out once four years ago and then he immediately vomited and honestly I've never gotten over him
Yo i still have 5 hrs left of work. I should not be this drunk
There way too many people in that club who have had their dick in me
short story short, i just screamed anal seepage in the middle of a diner.
I CAN’T BELIEVE YOU STUCK YOUR DICK IN CRAZY!
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