I would fuck her until my dick fell off. then i would fuck her with your dick.
Nothings more american than taking a shit with a handgun next to you.
MTV running anti-sexting commercials is a slap in the face to everything our generation has accomplished.
Yo I'm texting you while getting a bj. I know, I'm the man. Told her I was texting my mom in the hospital.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She was blacklisted from the Uhaul center...what the fuck do you have to do to get blacklisted from a Uhaul center
Crazy how fast a room full of drunk teenagers sober up when someone breaks his parents' new flat screen
i just keep picturing us drunk surrounded by kittens.
The only way to make beer can wizard staffs any better is to sew your own wizards robe and hat to go along with it. welcome to tuesday nights at my new apartment
You made a course evaluation for your vagina? Wow. You really are a professor now.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
About to go get a free burrito for kissing a bald man in public
I had 17 beers 2 days ago. I'm not dad material yet
MORE IMPORTANTLY I THINK I JUST WATCHED SOMEONE GET SO LONELY AS TO TURN BISEXUAL??
our jesse-walt dynamic is actualy really perfect because i want to start a small time drug empire and you want to get high a lot its very accurate
im in DESPERATE NEED OF A COMPANION RIGHT NOW I’M MOTHER FUCKING TRIPPING SOLID GOLD BALLS
Look, road flare archery was agreed on. We both accepted it was a shit idea sober, but did it drunk anyway.
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