I hate your face
He had the Transformers symbol tattooed to his chest. We had to do it doggy style so I could laugh into my pillow instead of his face.
she requested me as her brother on facebook.... biggest. letdown. ever.
I saw the video from Saturday. So, how much did I drink for me to think I was a duck and strip my clothes?
how do you feel about lunch break shots ?
Did you know you could bring s cooler of beer to the nail salon?
As hard as i've been partying lately their gonna have to revoke my organ donor status
During breaking dawn, he leaned over and asked me why she would have to worry about her period since she essentially just married a walking super-absorbant tampon... It was the best way to ruin those movies for me.
Just woke up to the best idea ever. Vodka infused BUTTER. Take a second, and think of the possibilities.
Haha at least the one I have like that you can't tell we are completely drunk and you're about to kick a glass out of my hand in a fit of joy over pizza.
I'm not entirely sure how getting 'house drunk' turned into us getting trashed, being serenaded by karaoke and going out. But it needs to happen again.
btw, whatever u do, dont try and take that towel away from her..i tried, it got ugly..she said some things im sure she regrets.
I can still taste the Jäger. I'm gonna shoot myself.
You were petting a 40 year old man's moustache for 15 minutes
Do toy wanna orseer frim onedof tjose plaves? Sry textimg with globes on
Gloves*
Out of all the words to correct, you chose gloves??
Randomize
