sitting in class between the roommates of the two girls i fucked over break. this feels like a bad version of wife swap
so i turned around to do some reverse cowgirl when he said that this was such a better visual for him. Bad compliment or serious insult. i cant tell
While at warped tour today a girl was crowd surfing and her vagina landed in my face, I call that a successfull day.
He introduced himself to me as "the gayest gay who ever gayed." I like him already.
i just declared my major based on how close the department building was to our apartment. laziness has been brought to a new level
You see.... Im at the point in my life where pissing in a toilet is a luxury for me
I'm getting to the point of going up to a guy and saying "Hi I'm maggie and i can put my foot behind my head"... That desperate.
I deem her datable let the dance of attraction commence
Jusy read on a science page that squeezing boobs can prevent cancer cells from forming in them, youre welcome.
Whenever we go out my brain flips on autopilot, straight to blackout.
I need to thank someone for this kid's penis.
It was the needle in the haystack of teary, unpleasant handjobs.
I turned off my domesticated goddess switch over 2 years ago and idk how to turn it back on. So in the mean time I'll dodge this gf bullet and eat free steak for as long as possible
Damn victory sex feels great
And to be clear I have only watched porn like 3 times at work
Randomize
