So I'm sober and underage, being hit on by a groom-to-be with braces...is it a bad thing that I'm enjoying it?
Is it weird if i grunt like Tim Taylor when im having sex AND grilling steaks??
At a straight bar and poker face just came on...must...resist....urge to gay it up
Why would that come on at a straight bar? I thought they just played Don't Stop Believin and Wonderwall on repeat
If I were trying to take advantage of you I would have maxed out all your credit cards by now.
Just looking for some anal play. An attempting to read atonement. The highbrow/lowbrow divide is striking.
I'm cooking a can of baked beans on the baseboard heater. It is too early in the semester to be this poor.
...and all my boxers are outside in the snow because????
There's gotta be a happy medium between the guys who only want to sleep with me and the ones that respect me too much to try to sleep with me.
'lets look at pictures of your friend's new baby' was probably the worst post-sex idea we've ever had
which one of you assholes put my new jeans down the garbage disposal?!
I am not getting you a goat.
Fair enough. I am not going out with you. The goat was not negotiable.
Seeing your boyfriend, side piece, and great white buffalo, all in one night? Its a sign right?
Proceed with caution.
Just realized tomorrow is the anniversary of the time Dean and I glued DJ's leg back together with Neosporin and an Ace bandage. I'm bringing red velvet cupcakes to the party to celebrate.
I'm pretty sure I naked in my first year of college more than I was as a baby.
I just found out why people like handcuffs.
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