idk, it's all black and i hear low talking...
dude, i think you're in initiation!
shit. that's not good.
I totally thought the tree was playing the guitar
Is it wrong that I didn't stop masterbating when the credit card company called?
did you answer or finish?
both
This girl just stopped in the middle of a sentence because of my blue eyes. She said she got lost in them. I am laying pipe tonight.
Hopefully. Play it cool. Bust out a few jokes. Chew with your mouth closed and show your boobs.
Waking and baking has revolutionized how i brush my teeth. Seriously up to like 25 min everry morn. Highly recommend
A beer fell out of the case, hit the ground and started spraying. He's a pro. He grabbed it and shotgunned it while still holding the case.
my goal was to make out with as many people dressed as batman as possible. I have my priorities.
I think making out with someone could be the cure to all my problems. That or more cowbell.
That's what you get for doing kinky shit with a guy that lives in his moms basement.
Can I just lay in bed and you pour vodka through a funnel in my mouth?
Secrets from the porn industry: liTERALLY SHOVE A SEA SPONGE UP YOUR VAGINA GO ON DO IT
I finally got my restraining order in the mail. Was that supposed to upset me? I'm just over here like "TELLEM BOY BYE!-\nlegally..."
i guess she just walked over ass naked and peed on his laptop. gonna call an over price on that drunk sex.
I'm declaring this weekend Captain Morgan weekend
You declare every weekend Captain Morgan weekend...
You just don't understand... :'(
Randomize
