Outside the community dumpsters: beer bottles and a carton of orange juice. Looks like we were here.
I noticed how good my hair still looked. Apparently rum and coke in it helps it stay curly thru sex. May be using this more often.
I feel like we had some profound moment last night, but I can't really recall much past your ass turning up the volume on the radio.
If a man doesnt have the ability to fuck you well on a small climbing wall, I don't think he deserves you.
Its bad when you wake up with a penis drawn on your face. Its worse when you find out its traced..
The van in front of me contains people having SEX. I am in full view of a SEX VAN.
He purred while eating me out. HE PURRED AND I LIKED IT.
Literally too hungover to pull out of the driveway. Tried 3 times and failed. I'm going back to bed.
I have commenced my lesbian college experimentation. Wish me luck
Puking in the Ritz Carlton bathroom was actually kind of a nice experience
well i don't know if 30 seconds is exactly a good time but at least he bought me breakfast
i'm so glad to be in bed i'd like to thank the acadermy
You're a hot mess, you know that?
At least I'm a FUN hot mess. Like a train crash full of pizza, fireworks and glitter.
its Niagara falls. its like international waters. You can get away with anything there
What are you, a fucking toaster ?
Randomize
