My ? Is...... Would it be sweet or creepy to take a girl on a first date to chigago?
creepy.
when did we get so old that our friends started having LEGITIMATE children?
I swear to god he's a one man village people.
Apparently suggesting that she was the kind of girl who might be expected to kill someone's pets hurt her feelings...
I'm promoting my liver to CEO of my body cause it clearly works harder than anything else.
Do you think making a dress out of an "Open" flag that my friend stole from a bar, and wearing it out sends the wrong message? ....Or exactly the right message?
It's not too terrible. You just got a little naked and broke your arm.
He literally shoved the EMT, climbed in the back of the ambulance with his vodka and was like, "C'mon, people. Wrap this up. I got shit to do."
She bruised my penis again. But, trooper I am we kept on going.
I just heard a crying baby from out my apartment window and yelled SAME
Drunk sex on a hardwood floor is never ever a good idea. Lesson learned.
I've never met a penis that didn't think I was awesome.
It's difficult to focus on bonds when you know your classmate peed in your mouth
i dont know how or why im in the gym right now, but theres a hot cop, a guy i hook up with, and his hot friend. this can only lead to every fantasy i ever had.
The only thing good about being back at work is the lunch time hand jobs from the MILF
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