He's been sleeping iwht ***
Nooo
Yeah I don't even know how, she looks like her mom smoked crack while she was in the womb
And then hit her in the face with a shovel
I just had a dream where Bob Saget recognized me from when I hung out with him in a dream I had months ago.
Passed out for 3 hrs til now to wake up naked on my bed covered with grass from drunk slip and slide I would call that success
Wow, I just sneezed gum out of my nose. Wonder how long that's been up there.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Don't say that out loud. People might think I really like to pee on you.
Of course you don't like it. I am the one who likes it.
totally worth getting kicked out for trying to throw my drink on lindsay lohans ankle bracelet.
This makes me miss penis. Not in a horny way... but in a sad, sentimental way.
There are rocks in my bed. And dirt all over my face. Explain?
I was just too high to be in rapids man. I just screamed for the entire time I was jostling about.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You slid down the bannister into a split. Lines were crossed.
Your vase full of piss was still at his house and he still doesn't know.
Sweet! It'll be a "that-minor-I-used-to-serve-alcohol-to-is-no-longer-a-minor" party!!!
like when you break up with someone your virginity slowly starts to grow back & when it's done it's like ding ding ding you're ready to date again
I may or may not have tried to give myself a lobotomy
I think I won an award for shitting and vomiting at the same time.
Randomize