I reminded them that I didn't puke and I cleaned yours up! So huh!
There really should be an "avoid ghetto" option on my GPS.
Hi, my name's audrey!
Max?
Sorry, this girl is phone-stealing drunk.
Just saw an old man buy two cases of keystone light, a case of milwaukee's best and a case of icehouse. Degenerate alcoholic of senior citizen of the year?
I'm so glad i pay social security
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just filled up my pledge keg goblet with coffee at bp. They can judge all they want. At least I'm not killing baby dolphins.
the bar told me i would have to take an hour break so they could wash the shot glasses
I'm hurting so bad I actially had to wait for my mini wheats to get soggy before I could eat them..
I made out with a dude last night who has an ex wife. Is this what post grad life is about?
i had an epiphany while laying on the driveway for 5 hours yesterday.
i realized i waste a lot of time
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
By the power invested in me i promise you hot wedding sex at my wedding.
coughing up blood. I'm leaving for the doctor now. P.S. I just won $350 on the wheel of fortune machine in the casino.
Did he think I was flirting with him when I ordered a hot dog bc no
Had a dream I dropped the L word and immediately threatened to kill myself
You probably shouldn't be having nightmares about expressing affection
wyd
Laying here debating on if i want a sandwich or an orgasm.
She was calling him Bob Saget and asking him to buy her shots....how do you think the night went?
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