i just turned barefoot contessa into a drinking game. everytime she uses a knife butter or salt i drink.
Classy? Dude, she fucked 3 guys as part of a scavenger hunt
And?
Also I just saw on facebook your sister is taking pole dancing lessons. Just a heads up.
I used to practice getting hit by cars.
So the coke mirror was perfectly angeled at my face right when i woke up this morning. I now know how I'd look on intervention.
Tough to say exactly how to play this. I just know people don't like surprises when genitals are involved.
there's chocolate cake in my bathtub.. I don't even want to know how the hell chocolate cake wound up in my tub..
Ecstasy should be its own food group.
Smoked a joint with my old camp counselor and now we're going to a strip club. There is a god.
someone wrote my own number down on my hand and then call me.
I didn't know. I guess I really haven't had that much time for drinking lately. I mean, outside drinking at home/work.
If you sleep with him again I'll have you spayed
Peanut butter and whiskey is not a dinner
If you can't beat em, make them send you dick pics so they can't do anything stupid again.
He said 'I really struggle with the sin of lust' then we proceeded to have sex. So I guess it was a perfectly executed Catholic pick up line?
Randomize
