I'm waiting for seagulls to eat this throw up
I must have had a great time last night.. I woke up with coconut oil all over my glasses
after the first, "yea you like that baby", i quickly remembered why i had stopped having sex with him.
i am YELPING strip clubs. This is interesting.
It's 4th of July all over again, we were chasing with the pool water.
I woke up next to her will a oven mit taped to my cock. Dear god, I might have tried to use it as a condom.
Think I just saw your homeless guy on High Street. Did you give him back his crutch?
Just fucking put out. It'll be a good lay, promise. Stop being a prude. Damn it. A boy is trying to put his penis in you. APPRECIATE IT.
Man, only now that I'm single is it painfully obvious that I have zero booty calls in waiting. This could be a cold winter
When and where the fuck did we get a beach ball??
Woke up this morning with an extra $35 and someone else's ATM receipt. How much did I drink last night?
I don't think I bit anyone but I woke up to scrapes knees, bruises and new friends.
I can't wait to see you again. It will be like when we first started dating- but with less clothes.
you know it was a good night when you wake up with a medal around your neck
I told him he had to put his dick inside of me at approx 1159 to ensure it was birthday sex. i was 19 when he entered me.. came out 20. winning.
Randomize
