I'd call her a cunt, but she dooesn't seem to have the depth or warmth.
Well at one point you put icyhot on your feet because you lost your shoes and it was snowing outside.
i just got cockblocked by a guy drinking wine straight out of the bottle with a straw...
the fact that my dorm room overlooks a children's daycare is enough initiative for me to have safe sex.
gay flight attendant. racoons. kegels. bartender with missing teeth. too many birthdays. fucckk.
All I remember is running out of the bathroom with one shoe on and the other in my hand. Pretty sure I was yelling as well.
I ate goldfish off your shoulder, I think we had bigger issues
Cleaning my pipe and using the left over resin solution to make THC laced rolling papers and a jar of hash oil/honey for my tea
WE USE THE WHOLE BUFFALO
He's a psychology major, so instead of becoming a stripper, I'm just working out my daddy issues with him. And his cock. And spankings.
They're much more educational now btw. Don't judge.
I rather not break my neck. It's hard to look sexy with a neck cast.
What could go wrong? i could have a mental breakdown with a bottle of champagne hand cuffed to a frat bro
You told everyone to shut up then told the officer that you are 21 when you drink.
i told you i was taking the Metra Train, and you asked what type of drug that was.. so yes i believe you when you say you were fucked up
If I could eat my chicken parm naked, it would be the closest I could ever be to God.
Well Jon got a DUI sleeping in the back seat so I thought the trunk was safer. BUT WHO CARES WHY JUSE PLEASE COME LET ME OUT!
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