i find it simply astounding you spelled drunken wrong but pterodactyl right
Were not really friends so much as I suck his dick a lot
this is not okay. even my mom refers to me as a sorostitute.
the fire alarm went off. we werent sure whether to leave or turn the music up louder
I just won't go as hard tonight. Four dollar ladies night drink or drown is not a good idea for me. I like to get my money's worth.
Count me out. I seem to have semen induced blindness in one eye.
Didn't want you to think it had been open season on my vagina since we broke up.
its like my brain is a tree and you are those little cookie elves
He even wore it to bed. What the hell. He's too excited about that goddamn costume.
Is her dick bigger than yours?
No fair. I need a fuck buddy to entertain me till the power comes back on
Like a gentleman I waited until you were done vomming to start my Big Mac.
I almost forgot to feel shameful, if that answers your question.
Always keep a stash of tequila in your work desk. That is like adulting 101.
...this is why fuck buddies should be only for grownups.
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