When I saw him standing at full height, I realized exactly how much his body structure reminds me of his penis.
I just found 'pokemon orgy' in my search history
Of all the things I am low enough to do, how could you even doubt if that was one of them?
Well the strippers have danced to goo goo dolls and green day, time of your life. Were all gonna commit suicide.
Come over so we can hookup and eat tacos. Those are 2 things you can't possibly turn down.
Its not like i paid for sex. She was stuck there, we simply exchanged rides.
my roommate just said she thinks she got a flashback or some memory of me getting hit by a car.
I have what looks like a rubber stamp mark on my cock from last night that says "Magic Marla Approved" Do we know a Marla?
It's disgusting. He breathes through his mouth and just sounds fat. Plus he chews all loud and shit.
he had a beard, sexy nerd glasses and kept referring to his penis as 'this dick' its like jesus was saving my perfect match for my prime
If I showed up at your door with pizza and a bottle of tequila wearing nothing but chaps and a fireman helmet, would you send me away?
Smoking a bowl in nothing but a flamingo thong.
He called my vagina "the man cave", and I found it charming
I don't suppose you have a recipe for a cocktail made of bitter resignation, regretting everything, poor life descisions and deep-seated self-loathing?
I can't believe I'm going to buy bitcoin to pay for erection pills
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