At some point I made a semi-conscious decision that i was okay with sleeping in my own vomit.
puked in the new hous. now it's officially home.
So you started off by saying "no homo," but patting his crotch and saying his jeans fit him wonderfully may have overshadowed that.
why do all the strippers look like they came from fraggle rock
I developed a drinking game for WoW. Everytime I die, I take a shot.
Please get laid.
He dated me before I started drinking. I feel like he deserves a consolation bj for all the effort he had to put in to get in my pants.
i like to finish this college football season knowing that not once have I had to masturbate to erin andrews
You drunk invited us to do an intervention for you.
As a general rule, drunkenness and gymnastics do not mix.
Europe's "the final countdown" was playing. It was pretty much amnesty for anything that might happen the rest of the night. It's a rule.
He is gay. There is no bi when you have a manhunt AND you are an art major. That's like a unicorn without a horn, it just isn't possible.
While we were driving she just screams from the backseat: MUMFORD AND SONS DROP THE BANJO and made what were meant to be banjo sound effects
He asked if I had feelings for him while I was lying naked on the floor vomiting into a trashcan as he held my hair and fed me Pringles.
I said he looked like a lumberjack and that's when he came. I guess he liked the beard compliment?
I'm sexting at my family's 4th of July BBQ and I feel no shame....
Randomize
