A hot woman with candy. This is what heaven is filled with
Dude, I'm in her bathroom and there's crab shampoo... is it worth the risk?
You're missing what this discovery implies... she's got a fucking bush.
I wish there were wingman of the year awards.
I caved and texted him. But it's strictly drug dealing business so it doesn't count.
you have a cum towel under your bed, you're the definition of single
then my gynecologist said "its like opening up buried treasure"
Thats not how it works. You get the Rachel, and then Rachel kicks you out. Don't linger or try to cuddle, its just pathetic and makes me look down on you and your penis
The walls are thin & apartments are narrow so all the bedrooms are next to each other. Our complex could compete in synchronized orgasms.
I'm in charge of his party but you're a paramedic, we're both needed.
Shits getting dirty between us in her dad's bedroom. I'm talking early millennium rap and r&b
You said something about how beautiful my pockets were, then walked away.
Yes talking about pockets is classic me.
That's one good thing about being an only child. I can masturbate wherever the fuck I want
Simple revenge plan: break into his house and steal one shoe of every pair
I'll do my best. he just keeps yelling beer and doing dick helicopters
ANNA YOU PEED ON THE STREET. LIKE NOT EVEN SUBTLY. YA JUST SQUATTED IN THE MIDDLE OF THE HIGHWAY. And you flashed your tits to oncoming vehicles to try to get them to pick us up
Stranded. In bathroom stall. No toilet paper. I repeat NO TOILET PAPER! Assistance needed asap. GO! GO! GO!
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