sometimes when you bring the thunder you get lost in the storm
so I was thinking like, Rob Pattinson could make so much money whoring himself out dressed as Edward Cullen.
yeah, I mean if he's down to fuck a lot of fat chicks and stare at Tiger Beat posters of himself above the bed...
I didn't think it was possible but there may actually be TOO MANY pictures of me tagged shotgunning.
Upon further investigation it turns out it wasn't blood, but chocolate frosting from the cupcake I shoved in my pocket to "save for later"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We legit stopped the the game so that Jamie and I could throw up in the bushes, and then continue to play intramurals... this is what my life is coming to1
Also what is the name of Americas thing where we had a holy obligation to expand westward? I'm going name my new lighter that.
Her dad high fived me on the way out the door. Not the reaction i expected after she came so loud.
It was super embarrassing when I had to tell my brother, in front of my mother, that my wifi password was Drinkupbitches. Thanks for providing that lovely family moment.
Dude just bought the table 3 bottles of champaign and broke one on the floor as his "signature" and he makes me want this recession hit harder
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You were carrying a 6 ft lamp that we stole on your back yelling "OHANA MEANS FAMILY AND FAMILY MEANS NOBODY GETS LEFT BEHIND"
I'm eating taquitos in the bathtub at 5:30 am. What a great end to the night
It's like fucking tetris in this bed
how do do this?
do what? Keep standing? Choose between 2 guys?
keep making boys cry?
Have I told you i love you?
there's no need we are two peas in a naughty pod of fuckery
Of course he’s picking me up at the airport. I taught him the Lotus position last time we had sex.
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