More tranny stories later!
dude my grandmas the shit. she has a sixth grade education and got hit by a car when she was 18. she cant smell.
She smells like mac and cheese, right after you add the cheese. It's strangely erotic.
She threw up in the hot tub how's your night
We literaly had to peel your fingers off the jose cuervo bottle and lock it in someones room
Fuck at this point id do just about anything for 20 bucks
That has been your downfall in past encounters with 20 dollars bills
I decided that Calgary can keep my underwear. They earned it.
at what point last night did i decided to have a photo shoot with your camel toe
I am "lost the control of my head" high right now.
My dad just sent me a text reminding me to bring the family beer pong championship belt. Thanksgiving 2012 just got real
i've written a new chapter in the saga of unexpected dongs
He tried to do the do on me last night and my exact words were "stay away from my princess parts. they're renovating."
Sitting in my car feasting on the spoils of Taco Bell as Donna Lewis croons "I love you, always forever." A more perfect moment will never exist.
how do you politely tell someone their toddler looks alarmingly similar to the berries and cream guy
you know its getting late when the "nevers" are turning into "maybe"
Randomize
