you dont need to remember merediths name haha. only jane
My carpet still smells like piss and I THINK YOU KNOW WHY.
omg my older sister has been googling "how do I know if I've had an orgasm?" and "bj tips". the family laptop is not meant for this...
so either half this theatre is as stoned as me, or day daybreakers is hilarious
once i realized i was actively trying to drink the beer i was sweating out of my body i knew it was time to go to bed
if your not going to answer your phone this is just going to be an embarrassment tomorrow
All I remember from last night is petting the broom with my feet and feeling like I was standing on a horses head
they lined up to high five me when i got taken out by the stretcher. The paramedic high fived them too
My vagina supports interfraternal relations
At least I will not still be rolling when I pick up this animal. Thats a good development in five years
He was dressed up as Jesus and had vodka in one hand while he was blessing everyone and splashing them with holy water in the bathroom.
There was blow residue on my chem book and my TA was like, did u stain your notebook with CaCO3?
Then again, he has huge mansions.
*manboobs.
the police report says i screamed sanctuary from a jungle gym at the playground when they caught up with us, obviously they disregarded international law.
That's the second time the same cop pulled me over well a different girl was giving me road head
Randomize
