Aj just asked if we were going to the bulldog tonight..i told her no because of the expense and tests coming up..but mostly because i don't want herpes
jacking off on stolen wireless... gotta enjoy the small things in life
So my teacher figured out I made a drinking game out of her lecture. Once my drink was gone she let us out. Happy St. Patricks day class. Your welcome
He took a banana and in front of everyone showed her how he wanted it done.
Theres a picture of me with cut up clothes rolling in the policeman's lawn, I missed you, summer.
Decided to go explore a half built apartment complex at 4 a.m and leave a 3 block obstacle course in the alley ways on the way home.
Ok. Here's the plan. Take your hand (whichever is closest), summon all your nerve, and just stick it right down his pants.
I love you.
She had a cast on when I met her, but she blamed me for breaking her arm this morning. I'm gonna marry this girl.
I got you a "sorry you think I'm pregnant" present
He said I took his samurai sword off his wall and proceeded to jump off his porch at people coming home from the bar.
Look I'm sorry I stuffed your wife's bouquet toss but I won't have that weak shit in my house.
We cuddled after till the morning. Then he woke up sober... and straight.
The cop said he like my hair today. Please explain all other interactions with law enforcement, k thanks
So, got kind of drunk last night, made out with some guy, and somehow stole his credit card. Don't even know.
Bourbon is too strong for my cat, he does not want to drink it
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