I wanna put my baby in that!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Ew you even made it your fb status
Ppl probably think ur having a kid
I hope
Love having children with random chicks
U Should have said " it's ok baby most girls Sh*t when I do that.
If I ever start a band I'm gonna name it "Nancy Reagan's Vagina"
I wish I could drop acid with the muppets
Fiestas. Its like a classier verson of mardi gras.
he urdandictionary'ed 'tease' on his phone and made me read through all the definitions. Am i really that bad?
You slept in the bed with him... with your top off.... and just made out with him....
im trying to find a facebook picture of him that doesnt make me regret sleeping with him. its not working
We looked at pictures of a Texas banjo contest from 2006 for a half hour and then were surprised by who won. That stoned.
So the night ended when we tried making fireworks out of gunpowder and oregano. You can figure out how that went.
Just purchased ketchup, body wash, and lube. Hope you're ready for the post-memorial-day-cookout-shower-anal.
This is where you say "Why yes we will drink with reckless abandon and hopefully not be in a church parking lot again."
Finding that toy duck there was weird right?
No I have an idea, I saw you running through the neighborhood at 3am while I searched for my flip flops in a ditch
Trying to ignore the fact that a kid I hooked up with twice just gave me spare keys to his house ... and car.
You realize that if you get murdered while we're talking, I'm gonna have to explain to your next of kin why the last thing on your phone is a picture of my boobs.
We're both fucking guys named Frank. Our friendship was meant to be.
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