But regardless, you really stood out last night, you should give me a chance
Sorry but you seem like a potential womanizer
I thought this kinda shit only happens to ugly people
do you wanna get some fucking pussy tonight.....THEN DRESS LIKE IT
There should be a blender full of rum, tea, and grape jelly in the freezer. She thought it was a good idea until she blew chunks.
I would like to add..this is the first november for two years that i haven't cheated on a bf...thank you..thank you
the guy in the stall next to me, came in, farted, laughed, and proceeded to give himself some sort of hillbilly pep talk that included the phrase "big pussy".
all 3 of us brought blondes home last night. all 3 are passed out. we're gonna switch rooms and see how long until one of them notices.
I would ask what did you do but I feel like who did you do is probably more appropriate
what kind of one night stand wants to walk you home in the morning? whole diff kind of walk of shame.
I took a hang over nap infront of the door to my 9am class
The police report said "I asked the suspect if he had any identification. He replied yes and gave me a Pizza Hut gift card"
Good, I don't think Coke dipped ring pops hold up in the mail anyway.
I woke up and he already had a joint rolled waiting next to the bed. Love.
wish he had known he had poison ivy on his cock beforehand... Is calamine okay to put on your vag?..
Come by so you can take a pregnancy test with me. It's like my monthly ritual!
Randomize
