I wannas sexs uuuuu
Literal conversation "you are ________ ____. you facebook friended me"
john hughes is dead. crushing any and all dreams of me ever being in an 80's john hughes film. bummer.
Not even the dog will look at me anymore.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dear vodka that I hid in a water bottle in the backseat of Blairs car, I'm sorry that she gave you away to a man on side of the road with an over heated engine. I'm sure the car doesn't appreciate you as much as I would have.
im sitting in the back of my pickup eating an artichoke. please come find me, im scared.
that was a mass text, wasnt it?
hey as creepy as this sounds i still have your eyelashes on my desk
SARAH B AND I ARE GOING TO GO HALFSIES AND BUY YOU A CAT. IS THAT OKAY. TO KEEP YOU COMPANY DURING THUNDERSTORMS SUCH AS THIS ONE. ITS BECAUSE WE LOVE YOU.
she tried to douche with champagne. in front of all of us. unabashedly.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
WE COULD TOTALLY DO ECSTASY AND GO TO THAT CAT SHELTER OFF OF BROADWAY.
I'm sitting outside your room listening for sex noises eating pepperoni...slowly
After you puked in the bathtub you claimed you were never eating quesadillas again and you never even ate a quesadilla
I woke up with masking tape on my nipples this morning........... WHY DO BAD THINGS HAPPEN TO GOOD PEOPLE
I would cock slap so many things if I had a cock.
I've got two reasons for you to come over later and one of them is pierced.
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