Too bad my picture didn't come thru. It was one of me naked riding a unicorn with a wizard hat and a magic staff. And the unicorn had wings. And me too.
paul mccartney is starting to look like angela lansbury
Eww. Jon Gosselin got both his ears pierced.
He looks like a bad one night stand.
I'm watching a show called "I didn't know I was pregnant" on TLC...Apparently this happens enough that there is a series
my phone is just a graveyard for last nights mistakes. at least it's giving me hints as to where i was though, i'm like carmen sandiego
i just used a pokemon card to do blow. i need an adult. now.
pretty sure i had my hand down BOTH their pants at the same time at some point...
sex in a ball pit. and I thought ghandi did great things.
omg he fucking fingered me this morning. and i was just like this is the most awkward alarm clock ive ever had
Spending my graduation money on an abortion. Welcome to the real world.
Because of his penis, I can't even look at a hot dog
The weekend is off to a good start: she just got into a verbal fight with a hobo. Nearly a fist fight.
New year means new boundaries for the Brazilian lady.. I'm pretty sure I got wax on my asshole
My professor congratulated me on turning my assignment in early. I didn't have the heart to tell him I only passed it in early cause my sex plans got canceled for the night.
The fuck kind of sorcerer makes a pact with tequila
Most of the people I know from AA
Haha touché
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