Good. I was naked most of the night. But sometimes I would wear my tux vest...But only my tux vest. It was classy
yay, now i'm not the only homewrecker.
yeah but i stopped sleeping with him after i found out he was married.
The bubbles in my bathtub are singing to me in german....
He was putting purell on my boobs saying "they need to be clean for later." He hadn't had a drink all night
What'd you guys eat?
Literally everything that was frozen.
the last thing i remember is inserting the sippy stray into the jack daniel's.
I did the seizure Bad Romance dance again last night, didn't I?
you were really good actually. your skill is increasing over time
Have thirty minutes until my shift starts. My heart says liquor store but my future says no
She just sat there, all alone, with a bottle of booze. And the dog. He even looked like he didn't wanna be there with her.
She fell down the stairs and hit her head on the concrete. Then she stood up, flashed us and stumbled away. I forgot to get her number..
Human Centipede: The Drinking Game. This is non-negotiable. First one to pass out the rest of us get to FEEEEED THEM!
The Winnie the Pooh costume was great until you got drunk and started yelling at the kids asking for pictures.
Is there a polite/non-lush way to ask how alcohol ranks on their list of priorities? Because like idk how to break the ice furreal.
Twist bend and done? Jesus that sounds like a seventh grade hand job.
It's a Saturday night and I am in bed with two cats, a bottle of Riesling, and I'm masturbating to Iron Man. I'm great at being 21.
Randomize
