Life after highschool has not been kind to her. She looked fatter than Luke Wilson's face in those AT&T commercials.
There's a litter of kittens in my bathtub and beer cans everywhere. I want my apartment key back.
I think she must be bulimic. I mean, every time I see her I know i want to throw up.
He could tell i had a fever by feeling my tits. He gets docter of the year.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm pretty sure blacking out is a coping mechanism.
i've really grown. sober me left an alarm for me every 10 minutes that said NO FAT CHICKS!
dude. im stealing that.
Good point, clearly my love of penis contributed to my torn knee ligament.
tried to make it look like I had been conscious/awake and out all day when I stumbled into cvs at 6pm to buy plan B
update: I failed
Come here I'm naked
And I want mozzarella sticks
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Don't you hate falling asleep on the couch with a glass of wine in your hand? It's like dreaming about peeing and then realizing you've peed the bed only stickier.
Her handjob consisted of slapping me in the balls. I am never hooking up with her ever again ever.
My roommate just woke up to me masturbating in our room. I figured this would happen eventually.
wait you like me?? for my personality??
I know I was surprised too
I never thought I'd be on my couch watching Star Trek, getting my tits rubbed while crying.
We're hate flirting, damnit.
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