and this is why I hate my dad. He got 25x more angry with me when I wanted to drive a different route then he suggested to get to his house (more scenic- thus more enjoyable) then he did when I told him I was driving drunk with 4 people in the car and I got my 5th speeding ticket last night.
The paper boy just woke me up in the front yard again.
he just booty called me in advance instead of waiting til 3 am when hes trashed. i think thats really considerate and gentlemanlike.
Wine + wine + wine + wine + bud light = puke.
Most the numbers in my phone are mistakes. It's a virtual graveyard of people I should never pick up for.
I just saw a girl walking up the hill with a little red wagon full of booze... I want to be in her study group.
Just made a coke joke and literally drooled on myself. How do we feel about pavlov's theory of conditioning now?
she wouldn't play beer pong with me unless I took off the rollerskates.
is it possible that there's a used condom holding pennies in my bra? I'm so confused on what happened last night...
Just high watching the holiday fireplace channel. My space heater lends authenticity to the fire experience. Come over.
He came when he saw that my nipples were pieced
Last thing I remember was a hand in the pants. Then I woke up next to a full beer and a McDouble, which I promptly had for breakfast.
He suffocated between her tits, but she didn't notice because he still came.
Apparently we fucked, I kicked him out, then he came back and we did it on the coffee table and in the kitchen.
He's the first boyfriend I wouldn't cheat on. This is a really big deal for me
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