He's on drugs...like drugs for horses.
CAN CRIS ANGEL JUST LOOK NORMAL FOR ONCE?!
If they made snuggies with a sleeve for my morning wood, id consider buying one...
And that's when he stuck his finger up his own ass to prove it would feel good...
Funny, I didnt know that facebook statuses were for crappy song lyrics
we literally hit three floors of our apartment building searching for condoms. also got macaroni.
I hope the dean has a raincoat on because I'm prolly gonna throw up on him when I get my degree
Minus the pink eye. Do I look fuckable tonight?
Some guy wearing a horse mask just knocked on my door and started whinnying. I opened the door and he was like, "...oh sorry, wrong room..." so awk.
It was like inception, a dream, in a dream, in the back of a dodge charger.
I fail to see the problem of enjoying a glass of wine while I poop...
the point I'm tryimg to make is that you didn't need to take the whole box in with you
I think I might be harboring a Canadian in my womb.
Why is our fridge full of girl scout cookies and rum?
You told me to go grocery shopping.
Your life is quite full of dick lately.
It really is!
he told me that he only likes small dogs. I should have known he was going to end up being little bitch.