Turning 21 on Saint Patty's day. I like to think this is what my alcoholic ancestors have prepared me for
We started snorting MDMA at 3 in the afternoon...it was never going to end well.
I need a legitimate reason as to why the microwave door is in the shower
He would stand there for a few seconds with a blank look on his face then randomly start running full sprint towards macdonalds. We'd catch him and he'd promise to stop so we'd let him go and he'd do it again.
25 People Admit the Worst Things They’ve Done for Good Reasons
right before he passed out he said "take care of your tender spirit"
I hope to God 2011 is the year I stop loving tequila.
Bought two parrots for us. I'm keeping them at the Bellagio.
Ice skating? Did you see me last night? I don't even know where my socks are
Please tell me there isn't another video of me on the toilet...
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buying a tattoo gun on ebay just sounded like a good idea at the time idk man
Did you seriously just hashtag my sex life as #yolo2013?
There is a special place in Hell for whichever one of you put Ben Gay on my dildo. It was a very uncomfortable April 1.
Got drunk with him at an Irish pub ended up losing him for twenty minutes when I finally find him his piss drunk singing Irish folk music with a group of Irish guys and a midget
He meets the coolest people when he's drunk
I'm currently on a bowling date with my girlfriend and her boyfriend. It's pretty fun.
He got hotter. I'm offended on behalf of the rest of our graduating year.