A hard boiled egg and a shot of tequila is not brunch.
I don't know, but I don't want you to think its ok to show up at my house at 4 am with a gorilla suit and a bucket of pinnapple and think id be ok with it
Results of pregaming honors college basketball social: 18 points, 3 blocks, and 3 flagrant fouls leading to 2 broken bones on former valedictorians. I'm doing this more often.
If drinking before honors events and injuring our universities brightest doesn't get you kicked out of the program, you're not trying hard enough.
They wear helmets and mouth pieces when they drink...u down?
I tried to get you something for Valentine's Day too but they said they couldn't deliver skittles and ecstasy :(
Dude, you passed out sitting straight up AND in mid sentence last night
omg I just had an epiphany about why I grew into such a whore....
HAVE YOU EVER NOTICED WHAT THE SPICE GIRLS USED TO WEAR?!? those were my idols, I never stood a chance
I'm serious. My alarm label is "BAR TABS" as motivation for me to wake up in the morning and go to work.
You kept asking her which dick pills worked the best. She's a grandmother.
What did he say?
NOTHING. GODDAMN HIM AND HIS MAGICAL PENIS!
woke up to a case of keystone on my porch when I went to bed at seven that morning.. I think it's someone's peace offering for getting my roommates car towed
Something I can get at drive through, boobs out, don't want to get out of the car
I don't think I've ever had this many people offer me blow before. 3 o'clock on a Thursday. I keep good company.
Also, my guy said they would be around. And i clarified that when I asked him for mushrooms he didn't hear "a mushroom or two" but rather understood I meant "all the mushrooms you can find between now and 4th of July."
Did April legit get married in a parking lot?
Randomize
