Do u think she knows her nickname is the oompa loompa
the star wars geek is hitting on me, and is talking about his lightsaber. need back up NOW
A homeless man in dtwn SF was blasting lil wayne and singing at the top of his lungs. I kinda wanted to give him my life savings
The only good thing about ohio is that i can get 2 half gallons of soco for 40 bucks
i'm pretty sure i'm on the same train we took last friday..
what?how do you know?
it appears they have not cleaned up your vomit yet.
Question. Will thrown up fruit loops go down the shower drain?
Just saw ur booking photo. Love that u were already wearing orange. Its like u knew
Also, I think I'm too drunk to be at the gym right now. But how sober do you need to be for IM volleyball?
I'm pretty sure they had a hash wedding cake. I love college weddings.
It's been two days. I am still burping up jello. Everything tastes like jello. Everything smells like jello. I am DONE with jello shots.
I plan on showing these boobs to so many people that by the end of it ill just have a shirt of beads.
Sorry, all I could picture was you jamming your dick into a lemon.
he forgot we were at my place and not his so he tried kicking me out of my own apartment by saying "so, you can go whenever you want...."
if you're the one who put those dollar bills in my bra last night, thank you because I just used that money to get myself a coffee
When Pitbull's songs sum up your life... you know it's time for some serious life changes.
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