There's something fitting about a hot in-car interracial makeout to the tune of 'healing the world.' RIP Mike.
So apparently when I roll on X I find 'dick ina box' not only hilarious but also sexually arousing.
I'm tuning in to watch Heidi Montag crash and burn on the Miss Universe Pageant. Somebody call 911. and I'm not talking about the Sean Kingston song.
Yeah! I got cockblocked by the blizzard last night. Lost girl on way to my apartment. Not a joke
i don't even remember going to get food. i think i got gas too.
i just opened a bottle of wine with my dads power tools
wearing the bible to the ABC party, thought you'd appreciate that.
classified somewhere between kinky and medically inadvisable
Here is your half hour reminder. Meet you at emergency room.
I wanna just rip ass and see his reaction but i bet itd be better to shatter that illusion when hes drunk
That's the 3rd time in 6 months I woke up on the hallway floor using a towel as a blanket, no clue how I got there. At least back when I was still drinking I could blame something other than myself for that kind of shit.
You should go to AA meetings and warn people about the dangers of sobriety.
I just made a dick pic collage. Let me just tell you,there is no comparison to the latest!
So, if you were also having sex around 11pm, then we were legitimately being penetrated at the exact same time. That is amazing. We are soul sisters.
I thought one was bad but really there are two woman stupid enough to marry our brother...unreal
I think I broke my dick but 10/10 would definitely do it again.
Randomize
