SEE! I KNEW I HAD A LONG-TERM REASON FOR BEING A SLUT!
I have tardy slips. and absent slips if you don't show up to the bar. and trust me, if you are absent there will be a saturday school. I'm teaching you how to drink tonight.
you were sitting on your bed looking out the window, rocking back and forth naked, saying how peaceful it looked outside
Kate gave me a 3 day old cup of tequila last night and forced me to chug it. P.s. i drew u a picture
I would never do this in real life. It's only college.
yeah I'm sure your grandparents are the best but it's halloween. get a slutty costume and let's go ham.
Ok so in the last 18 months I have now driven four different dudes into counseling. I'm like heroin with a vagina.
we can fight about whose fault it is later....naked.
Coming to you live from the floor of my office..
If you want me to retract my crazy cat lady comments pictures of yourself dressed as a cat are not the way to do it.
You understand the drunkenness of my drunkenness
No. Every time we go there, you end up getting high, then lost, then going home with strangers.
60% of the guys I've slept with are on my holiday greeting card mailing list. I'm an amazing ex lover.
it's not rock bottom until you fall down an escalator on the way home from a hookup and have to have you dad come pick your drunkass up at 3am. Adulthood.
What's the plan?
Not sure. I think I'll take a dump on his windshield.
Randomize
