Never fear I pulled out... she had "lies about taking birth control" written all over her
Did you fuck her?
If by "fuck her" you mean "threw up on her shoes," then yes, I achieved that.
why is pumping your own stomach in your searches on youtube?
Just bought an airhorn. Bad things will happen.
Police were closing down the bar due to gunfight and I was crying because they wouldn't let me finish putting temporary shamrock tats on my boobs
some gay kid said he wanted to blow him because "his eyebrows told a story"
Just walked by the neighbors and they are definitely butt naked sitting on a bed, watching Netflix, baked out of their minds, with the blinds open.
Welcome to Bellingham.
How about this: I support you through your miserable marriage, and you support me through all my anonymous sex?
You ever feel like just rubbing your face in everything like a dog?
He apologized for cumming on my leg, but not for ghosting me for 3 weeks before :(
I didn't realize how much I relied on you for a reason to drink on tuesday
We've been fucking like crazy ever since she quit her job..ive been running errands all day to stay out of the house and give my dick a day of rest
I hate my life now
Who fucking spams baby shark at a sports bar
He fucks strippers and doesn’t have a life plan. Of course I’m going to regret this
What part of “the stripper has a gun, we need to leave” is confusing you? She’s drunk, she’s fucking crazy and NOW SHE’S PACKING HEAT!
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