I can't believe you made out with me with a french fry in your mouth.
He adopted an old drug sniffing dog so that he won't lose his weed around the house anymore. It works.\n
I just tried to eat one of my ear plugs, thinking it was a cheese curl. I need it to be break RIGHT NOW.
Just found a pic on my phone of you on squatting on the hood of a police car about to take a dump. Care to explain what happened last night?
Who are these men, what are we doing here, how is this helping us toward our goals of sex and pasta? Things to consider.
He might not have any marketable talents, but the kid dry humps like no other.
I'm going through our high school yearbook trying to find what boys I want to hook up with this summer. We graduated four years ago. That's a problem.
it was good, but also weird. like, i came four times and then cried weird.
GET ME OUT OF HERE THE DOCTOR KNOWS HE IS JUDGING ME I DEMAND A PRISON BREAK
When she introduced her friend to me I shook his hand and told him not to leave his ugly vest at my apartment in the morning. He took it off and bought me a shot.
Life lesson 8263 if drinking a beer in the shower be careful when shampooing... Tresemme flavored rolling rock sucks
One more sleep until playoffs, Canucks are back this year, you bet your ass I'm going to uphold the tradition of being the 90 lb girl that fights every hairy ass Bruins fan at BWW.
Damn it. Can't order pizza. Can't do the hot tub. No one to invite over for loud, kinky sex. What's the point of being here alone?!
If it makes u feel any better my dick feels pretty tender dude
I found Erin. She's getting a back massage from the coat check boy and drinking all his whiskey.
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