I took shrooms, thc and molly but its okay i'm surrounded by freaks
Oh, don't even get me started. Harry Potter is so pure. Twilight is just teenage girl porn.
he made transformer sounds every time he changed positions. how do you think it went?
My farts smell like St. Pauli Girl. Last night was too much for a Monday.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
At this point I feel like i'm never going to be sober, and it's frightening
When you gave the girl your number the fat girl was like "take mine....here please take mine"
he's paying for my abortion by participating in an alcohol study. dont try to tell me we wouldn't be classy parents
Anxiously awaiting my period drinking Hershey's syrup from the bottle. Don't judge me
All I found in my purse this morning was 160 cigarettes and a fistful of confetti.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You declared that afternoon sex will be referred to as "wet naps" from now on
Omg the world wants us to be better people
I refuse
did i get sucker punched in the face last night or was our make-out session just that intense?
I haven't gotten dressed in 4 days. God bless you, unemployment.
You ruined the universe
After he came, he took a two minute power nap and then fucked me for another 45 minutes. He is a machine!
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