My right nipple has been called many things but never a ghost pig
He started to lick my mole,thinking it was my nipple.
Flying to Orlando on the 7th is cheaper than the 8th by like three margaritas.
so today in my theology class we brought up the proper way to have sex. so rough sex was said by the teacher...I said I know a girl that likes to be choked. sorry but everyone knew it was you
this is something i pride myself on being below average for
we may have ended up at a gay bar on accident. we're gonna work this to get free drinks.
We need somewhere to take these girls. Otherwise it's a orgy in the Mazda.
This from the guy I found eating salad out of a pot lid in his boxers on his porch last night.
Sorry I missed your call. Have a great morning.
That is a horrible way of saying good morning to someone. You basically reminded me that we did not hook up yesterday. It's bad enough I got to go to work all day with blue balls.
She licked EVERYTHING then yelled at me in Spanish. I just kept saying SI.
he went at my nipples like a starved dog.
I feel as though sleeping all day due to the effects of prescription painkillers paid for by union insurance made this the most American day ever for me
I asked this couple what they would like to drink and they leaned toward me eagerly and asked if we still have THE root beer ... Idk if this is code for please add cocaine to my drink
I made out with about ten people last night. And four of them were just on the way to my car from the bar. And one was my roommate.
I was doing karaoke to "baby got back" and apologizing for being white at the same time.
Randomize
