In retrospect, it was a terrible idea, going down on her with these ulcers in my mouth.
I love my penis, it thinks for me sometimes
dude. how can brian from family drink at fucking bars? he's a dog and definitaly doesn't have pockets.
Note to self: Not getting laid all weekend makes girls in mondays classes racks seem enormously bigger.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm so hungover I took Dramamine to help prevent the motion sickness of walking.
it's official, after last weekend my girl number is higher than my guy number. fix this.
I have a very important question for you: what are some good rules to have if we want to turn the nfl draft into a drinking game?
If you're asking how many times you took off your clothes and played with the tiki torches.....the answer is 3.
Dude, im sorry I had sex with that girl I was trying to hook you up with last night. Good news though she puts out
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Wearing rip off pants to a booty call last night was one of my most brilliant ideas ever.
I think you should do the fixer upper relationship. Like lawyers do pro bono work with underserved populations, you can do pro bono relationship work.
day drinking caused me to be in bed at a decent time. can't complain.
So I was dancing on a table with these three girls and my bro. Started to makeout with one and as the song ended I asked what her name was. She said, and I quote, "Nate we hooked up two weeks ago". To which my reply was to lift my beer to bro and proclaim, "RAGE".
Her pegging playlist is all heavy metal so stay away if you wanna keep your ass intact
I woke up while she was taking a panoramic photo of my morning wood
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