wow, i just saw a girl period all over the floor. get my shoes
The project manager just came into talk to me for the first time and I had justed googled best drum solo ever and couldn't X out of the screen.
you have to be so drunk to ignore a taser
I told them I was gay and asked them to pass the pie. I ruined pumpkin pie for grandpa.
There is a good chance that the other night after a wedding reception i was at that i mailed you a drink coaster.
she cried into her fur with two handfuls of money- she was the physical manifestation of white girl problems
And I was aware of my actions - that is not a penis I will say no to until I have a ring on my finger
Now I'm at the gym and I never want to leave. It's a combo of adderall and endorphins and I don't want it to go away
I'm kinda amazed by how many times I've texted the word penis today.
I think I shall call his penis Gatsby. We talk about it all the time, but I never see it.
Have you ever stopped and thought "I do NOT want to be inside of this person right now. Or ever." Because you should.
Give me a minute. I'm trying to buy moonshine from a railroad worker named "Cowboy."
I enjoy the level of friendship we have achieved until you ask me to determine what may or may not be gentile warts via iphone pic
i just realized I haven't been laid all summer. So sad. What a waste of a perfectly good vagina.
I'm basically doing the Walk of Shame without the added bonus of having sex last night. That doesn't look good on anyone.
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