i blacked out hard core.. it was bad peeeed muh bed
hot mess party of 2 ur bar is now available
You don't think I'm weird or immature right?
No I think it's cute we had sex on your Bob the Builder sheets
unlike you, ive never imagined darth vader masturbating
Hooked up with 8 guys, puked 4 times, got a few bruises, and my face is still numb... I think this visit has truly impacted my college decision
I think my hand is broken. But his nose definitely is
Also, if someone could cut me off before im rolling around the yard pantsless with a 40 year old lesbian that would be awesome.
Some people say 6pm is too early to get drunk. To them I say this dinner is delicious.
Your car is in front of my house. Keys are in the mailbox. There is a fire hydrant in your trunk. Happy Birthday
We just saw two bitche in pink capris jazzercising down the road. On Thanksgiving.
I just used my citation as a bookmark. Want a beer?
Cocaine is ok on a cleanse, right?
I'm here. Help me get the salsa and bong inside.
It threw me off a little. I had to take a moment and ask myself, "Is he really fingering me in his mom's kitchen while I eat a whopper?"
She moved all of her stuff out while we were gone. Shit in the toilet, and didn’t flush. So yeah it went well.
Randomize
