if you force a hooker to have sex with you and dont pay her would it be rape or theft? something to ponder
I can only name 15 people I've had sex with - can I just start claiming that as my sex number?
so you had a one ended conversation with the toilet las night in between barfs. you kept telling the toilet how strong it was because its gone through a lot of shit in its life.
drunk me is so punny.
Sure, fine. Daughter just told me she is not a virgin anymore. I am gonna start drinking now
Hurricane Earl: Get Blown party at my house friday! Byob: bring your own bitch/booze. Must have 80s blown hair style, kazoo/noise maker (vuvuzelas/airhorns are allowed), and/or bubble wands. \n
Why am I even shocked you're doing this....
My niece just unknowingly cock blocked me. Obviously, someone won't be getting a christmas present this year.
Within 24 hours, I went to a feminist documentary screening with two state reps and you hate fucked a rent-a-cop on the helipad of your hospital. Somewhere our lives went in different directions.
I still make more money.
can I share that I'd like to fuck him in my new car as a sort of car warming present to myself?
I honestly don't think it will ever get topped. Unless a real female cop arrests me, then fucks me. That's it.
He'd rather cuddle with his shitty little miniature dog than the half naked girl in his bed. I've lost all hope for him and my vagina
We had sex to beyonce's "drunk in love" and then he order me pizza. It was perf
Because making bad decisions is what makes our house great and I don't plan on changing that anytime soon.
i just ran butt naked down the hall and someone highfived me. i love college.
Speaking of dignity, who all saw me....
I have to close one eye, because I don't wanna see two movies, I only want to see one.
Randomize
