soo apparently i was out of money so i stayed in the bathroom for an hour-ish passing out paper towels for money..needless to say i got kicked out
So yes, he's hot, a scorpio, an artist and a perfect cock. I think my bi train just arrived in gay town.
He's trying to get everyone in the bathtub for a team meeting about how we're gonna find his car. Which is parked outside. Think we should cut him off?
i just kept saying he was red & i was blue and we couldnt become purple. I started crying at one point
I'm pretty sure that when my parents bought me those savings bonds they thought it would go towards something useful like tuition. Not your bail.
I told you I'd buy you lunch.
I always forget that visiting my hometown is like a who's who of ugly people.
Rick two cubicles down puked and that triggered three others puking into their trash cans as well. The janitorial staff hates it when we go drinking on a work night.
Aren't you proud to know somebody who texts you "manifold facade" while dumping frozen colada mix into a blender of rum
This question may sound intrusive, but how did pushing out a baby affect your vagina?
In my next life I better get to be a bird. Fuck flying. I'm gonna shit on your car. Every. Day.
DON'T PUKE iN THE PRINGLES CAN, WHATEVER YOU DO!
Just had to stop myself from doing a bump on the Disney bus. The struggle is real.
Which one have i been cheating ON and which one have i been cheating WITH if i met them the same night & have been dividing time equally?
He made me come so hard I punched another hole in the wall mid orgasm.
I'm not fixing this one for you. Do it your own damn self.
scale of one to ten how loathsome is it to save my chocolate easter bunny to use for a topping on my edibles
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