nothing as in nothinggggg kills the mood for me is when a girl with 4 cm nipple hair
Halloween 2010: the NuvaRing girls. You're Thursday. We'll walk into the party chanting "Monday, Tuesday, Wednesday, Thursday, Friday, Saturday, Sunday, Everydaaay".
MTV running anti-sexting commercials is a slap in the face to everything our generation has accomplished.
remember that guy i blew in a bathroom in barcelona, i just blew him again in rome. lightning does strike twice.
This Girl Got Ghosted By Her BF Of 5 Years While On A Trip They Took For Her Birthday
You were pouring Patron into the window of the squad car trying to get the police dog to drink it
So thats why that cop beat my ass?
Probably
We need to step up our tailgating...they're here drinking out of a prosthetic leg
We need to drink more. Just think how awesome it would be to wake up in a trailer and NOT remember how wee got here.
I never thought I would have to get vodka suctioned out of my ear
The trick will be getting hammered before we get to the first bar
Challenge accepted
People Are Applauding Chrissy Teigen For Getting Candid About Breast-Pumping
I had to rub one out before the Shabbat dinner in case I find a nice Jewish girl to fuck me in the bathroom.
Your mother would be so proud
I can't help but look at my sex life and acknowledge that this is not normal behavior.
Day two of not drinking, I think my cat is trying to eat me.
Psychosis secondary to sobriety???
I'm in Home Depot and I can feel the straight bob the builders staring at me. I bet it's like I have a rainbow arrow pointing at me.
As a courtesy going forward if you could not bang in my house that would be nice
Drank vodka clubs for 6 hours last night. Holy shit just realized that.
Randomize
