i woke up in his bed, he had my shirt on
and high school musical 3 was playing on his lap top
i think my mom watched the whole time
GM filed for bankruptcy, all the dealerships closed, and it's june and I'm in jeans and a sweatshirt and I'm cold. What is the point of living in this state anymore?
So I feel really bad about last night...can i give you a blow job and we call it even?
I just mixed tequila and nyquil in front of dad. hes making ambulance jokes but let me tell you its DELICIOUSSS
I'm not being over dramatic, but I think my heart is going to stop beating.
constantly striving to make life awkward and more complicated, one drunk bone at a time.
Well, my eyeball is red and the rest of my eye is black. Oh the joys of drinking with u. PS- I laid in a pile of sawdust. it was ok at the time.
They are stoned and trying to learn sign language together. It's like watching a chimp waving at itself in a mirror.
do you think our homemade porn will pass for my cinematography final?
I'm starting to think that birthday sex is just an urban legend. Like the boogey man, and woman orgasms.
I just remembered that we had an in-depth conversation about how it was too stressful to wear pants.
There is what appears to be urine on the woman's bathroom sink. I just have so many questions right now.
Me: 10% human, 90% poor drunken life choices.
may or may not have entered into a gay civil rights discussion with 6 year olds. Hint: I did.
Randomize
