no but I have been chillin' like em' homeboys in the rainforest yo!
i'm not a human right now. not even a dancer.
Do you have any idea how hard it is to cum to Chingy?!
i literally paused in the middle of it, turned on my light, pointed to the picture netxt to my bed and go "you hooked up with my roommate too!!! AWWW!" he was so weirded out. i don't think he understands the relationship we have..we share..
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It was perfect I came I passed out in his comfortable bed then a glass of jack Daniels fell from the bed post and spilled all over my face
I just called him "young grasshopper" in a conversation. THIS is why I don't get numbers when I'm sober
My halloween constume SCREAMS "Hey i just got done with a shitty relationship and I'm DTF"
Apparently I texted my high school english teacher asking her to tell me what logical fallacies she taught us three years ago.
I just pulled a piece of cookie out of my bra in the middle of class. I'm forever alone.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yeah, he has a kid now! Shit... You know you're all grown up when the people you used to have threesomes with become parents
I am pretty sure they consider me one of the "bros". They compliment girl's racks to me and are the human forms of dick-be-gone. They won't sleep with me more than once cause it's "weird", or let any "untrustworthy boys" sleep with me and I still help them get laid. Not...fair...
Oh god. I just had a sex dream about the talking dog from the Bush's Baked Beans commercials.
Up until today, I never would have thought I'd have to tell someone not to color on the cat
I can't handle more than one dick at once. I become crazy. It's hard to be mellow and free spirited and polygamous at the same time.
Like he was cock blocking and it usually takes ten cocks to block this cock
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