Yep Great. Apparently I didn't just say things once that night. Drink. Yell. Repeat.
U also mentioned u werent wearing any underwear hahahaha
Played the LOTR drinking game last night. Ended up in boxers running thru the lot at ross's place screaming "for frodo"
The walls in my apartment are so thin that sometimes when I fart, I stop to listen if people are laughing next door.
Last night I ate parmesan cheese straight out of the container while watching Chelsea Lately. Look at what happens to me when you leave.
Sometimes you gotta take the crosseyed stripper. fuck it
I demanded respect from my fuck buddy. Drunk me is not fun.
Based on the grey fur I pulled from my teeth, I think her vagina has mice.
I think now I understand why people say my penis is pretty.
It was all going fine until I had to chug that strawberita bud light. That really ended badly.
I've been sleeping with the same person for about two months now, I think I know a little bit about stability and commitment.
Sexy intern needs to have caveman sex with me
Good, I don't think Coke dipped ring pops hold up in the mail anyway.
At one point I had two blunts in my hand and had no idea where they came from.
Obviously you're feeling a little sexually frustrated.
I consider humping a stranger every ten minutes when I walk in the street.
It probably doesn't matter because I'm drunk...but I'm sorry for getting you drunk, having you almost lose your place to live, all your friends, permanently lose your liver functions, throwing up on my floor, losing virginity...etc...mostly I'm sorry for making you watch: cabin in the woods.
Randomize