Apparently throwing up on his dick didnt convince him to stay away . . . whats the most indirect way of saying "im just going to continue avoiding you"?
Just so you know, I have a bf.
I guess as long as you bring single girls over and cook cannolis you will still be useful.
I googled Canada's legal age of consent. I have good news. It's 14. Justin Bieber here I come...
I remember why I come home for the holidays. Sam Adams is the cheapest beer in the fridge
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you started crying because you didn't get to wear your rainboots this week so i turned on the shower and let you jump around in it
youre the best friend ever
I wouldnt endorse that guy if he was walking in a walkathon to raise money for a disease i had
They just yellow carded someone for spilling a drink because it was a party foul. Love germans.
True life. I have to get a nose job due to a deviated septum from blowing coke. Thank you college.
She had YOLO tattooed on her ass. Like, one cheek said YO, the other said LO. Even I can't handle that level of hot mess.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Got drunk and passed out flintstone vitamins to everyone at the bar. I'm just so god damn motherly
Her tits are absolutely massive. Like ripleys believe it or not shit
My girlfriend is so strong now. Like on the one hand its kind of hot because she can pin me down during sex, but on the other hand she picked me up and carried me bridal style at the company bbq.
You're up at 3AM, right? I have a very important question.
You know the Wendy's on route 6, by Kohls? Do you know if it has a drive through?
Yes it does.
just answer this one ? for me. why is there human shit in my shower right now?
Im drunk taking pregnancy tests with this really hot girl...i dont know what is happening
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