We were chasing that deer in the quad and next thing I remember I woke up in my RAs bed. I'm probably in trouble.
So are we goin out tonight?
Dude, we woke up in your car in some parking lot last night...
And that was fun, wasn't it?
the last thing i remember was trying to convince him to call over his girlfriend so we could have a threesome
Dont forget the glove box taco bell stash i saved for drunk us.
23 Roommates Share Secrets Their Roomie Thinks They Don’t Know
Wanna tell me why vodka seeped out of the memory foam when I climbed into my bed?
Just made a Xanax and ginger ale smoothie. Oh Thursday you are good to me..
Yea there's blood all over the porch but we wont have to buy alcohol for the rest of the week
Night is still young. Puking guts out part of it just began
All i really wanna do tonight is get drunk with you and dance on tables. is that too much to ask?
29 Cringeworthy Situations People Realized They Shouldn’t Be In
He's gotta be able to drive a truck, make me mac n cheese and give me the best orgasms. That's my perfect man
I can't tell if I have the Pizza Hut shits or beer shits
Let's hurry up so I can puke at home instead of my van
I'm the only person I know who could have actual sex and then dream about my vibrator.
I just woke up drenched in beer, in a puddle of beer, and cuddling a bottle of tequila
Someone called asking about the gate code and I said "hashtag" for # instead of "pound." Ugh. I feel so dirty.