Your parents are going to be so confused in the morning
More like pissed. but ill be sure to explain my pathological fear of terrorists hiding in the bathtub
I wish i could be there for it
she must wash her vagina with a dirtier vagina
not sure what i find more disconcerting, your text or the fact that i recognized that as a dane cook quote
Omg. There's def a kid, like 10 years old, sitting in a buggy at wal mart holding a sign that reads "I can't behave"
I've been deciding between brands of bagels for 20 minutes. This why I doint smoke weed.
Took an aderol, wrote a differential equation for solving volume of flow of a rectangular channel with change in depth, then masturbated for the 6th time.
This is the time you want your cat to have telepathy with you. To know if the guy downstairs left.
There is nacho cheese and blood everywhere.
Just got my first unemployment direct deposit!!!' celebrating at the beach
Me toooooo!! Margaritas
I never knew being a drain on a functioning society would feel so good
I'm making a date with someone on Playstation Home. That's how my sex life is going right now.
Currently hiding in the shower from the RA and my elbow turns it on. Showers and Ciroc don't mix..
My bad man. I was at a strip club, and apparently it's like a big deal to take your phone out in one of those places.
After that time I came to the conclusion that jeeps are the best cars to have sex in
Who am I kidding? With my track record, I'm going to end up sleeping at the strip club with just nipple tassels on.
I think its a little fucked up she invited you to her wedding, are you going?
There is a lot of acid in my drugs right now
....ill put you down as a no then
Is it wrong to want to use the Dark Web to buy Vyvance for legitimate purposes?
Randomize
