He keeps looking? I tried to shag. I invited him to this table but he went to ze other one! If he shaves his 'tache I would totally hit it.
I need a shot of tequila, and quick death
My cousin just asked what abortion is. Happy Holidays.
She laid down on my bed and played "I want you to want me" on my laptop. subtle.
You kept referring to your penis as "this guy."
I really should sober up and deal with this hangover
It seems to be one of those life decisions I'm perfectly content never making though
I feel like I shouldn't be doing my banking stoned. But I bought a new bowl. Her name is Sharpe. Pronounced Shar-Pay.
she just blew up the empty bag of wine and used it as a floatation device.
Kid got laid mid-party wearin a fuzzy hat with ears and 40's taped to his bear paws... wtf
I ate you ate to the whole david gray album
My night was too much. My morning is even more. Help. I need to teleport the fuck out of here.
Hey, I'm renting a storage locker for the summer to keep all my bondage shit in so my parents don't see it. You wanna split on it for your all your weed shit?
i like beer, sex, and cooking. what more can he want?
only 4 hours until nug lovin time
excuse me?
nug lovin. lovin nugs.
So... my daughter's new girlfriend Is the daughter of the girl I dated on and off in college Who ran away because she got pregnant at my house party. My Legitimate daughter Is probably fucking my Illegitimate daughter...
Randomize
