no, I didn't make it. Instead, i watched VH1 for... 13 hours? I use the question mark because I was using Flavor Flav's clocks to tell time after the first 3 hours.
For some reason I have a hard time believing getting drunk and recreating a movie about singing transvestites is ever very far from a situation you're in.
She tried to escape and she fell and hit the door. She's gunna freak when she wakes up with only half a tooth.
Bank of America: Available balance is $546.25 on 03/04/2011 for account 8428. Go online for details. TextSTOPtoStop/TextHELPforHelp
i loe djcudia fjxos rue.
Just got a voicemail from a guy referring tp himself "as chest hair guy". If I'm coming home to a intervention I understand.
I was basically shocked at how calmly you accepted my violently shoving a french fry in your mouth.
Out of all the people in the house to show their tits at mcdonalds to try and get free food, they picked those two?
Just used my front-facing camera to check my pupils. Technology!
I got to the party and found your shoes in a bag of Funyuns. You weren't even there.
I need an inhaler full of pot for all of this breathless rage.
I didn't know. I guess I really haven't had that much time for drinking lately. I mean, outside drinking at home/work.
A special kind of bond is formed between two people when they act as a pee shield for one another for drunken pisses in an alleyway
I'm sitting here drinking whisky and listening to The Wiggles, I don't need a social life
Fun fact: deep throating plus dehydration plus eating a lot of citrus = my throat is fucked. Metaphorically and physically.
I may have dislocated my hip getting fucked on the bathroom counter
Randomize
