you guys were way drunker than both of me
I took chris brown's side in the conversation ... cut to me not getting laid tonight
dude. i just ate tomato soup with a funnel. we're out of spoon-straws.
I think I have vodka in my lungs
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
That's terrible. At least give it a creative name like muff mobile.
Let's just say that watching the sunrise in a space helmet is really the only way to do it.
Good. I hope they all got E.Coli from snorting coke off of some homeless prick's asshole.
Last night when you stole the construction sign you told me to tell you that first you did it for the money Than you did it for the music But mostly you did it for your family
Didn't get carded at the bar. We're getting wasted and then walking over to Bass Pro Shops to watch the indoor ducks swim around. And possibly buying a tent.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think there's an ice cream truck out back, but there's no way I can get pants on in time to catch it
His flight is delayed. Mother Nature is delaying me from sex.
I'd just like to inform you. That when I was at bvj the first day I was blackout drunk by noon. Get on past Chelsea's level like now. Do it for present Chelsea
Saw the guy I once slept with, he was buying Beer and shit tone of diapers. Glad to see how 2016 will turn out.
Self reach around competition is what the Olympics has been missing all along. A true test of athleticism.
Why the fuck are you playing with legos?
Why the fuck are you questioning me?
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