Finally jerked of with a banana peel.
i ditched last period to have sex with him. i had to change into my skank clothes in the church parking lot. little kids were on the swings.
nothing about this is right.
It just hurt to pee because he was fingering for fucking gold in there.
I paid some man $10 for his shirt last night cause I liked it. Explains that. Bought the jackolope head from a street vendor. Got invited to someone's hotel rooftop swimming pool which explains why I was in my bathing suit. My clothes from last night are MIA. Going over the border with no pants on is awkward. Origins of the car rim still mysterious.
Come down. Bring Jorts. We're getting ready for this tricycle race like champions.
Disregard the shoes in the freezer.
i'd say i'm about at weeping-uncontrollably-in-a-puddle-of-my-own-tears-and-urine level
Well anyways I still cant believe I don't remember such a monumental day in history as you showing me your boobs... Jesus
This guy is trying to get me to do some acrobatic gymnast shit just so he can see "my tight hole." I'm too big to be sweating in my own damn bed. Shittttt.
Actually here it's more "lie around naked in a dark room" weather.
last night you told me I had a dark, salty butthole
I finally figured out how to tighten my bra straps and I feel like a god
Well the good news of being walked in on, my mom says your tits are pretty. Then she added that hers were like that once. Fml
I just told my bowl "sorry" for putting it down, because I thought I hurt its feelings. omg. I'm high.
I feel like my entire body is ashamed of me today
You're a god amongst men today
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