Potential corruption. He's 19.
Get them while they're young!
Journey is playing on the radio....I think it is a sign I am going to pass my drug test
I just woke up in my car with half the wedding cake next to me. This will not end well.
now I regret adding my aunt on facebook. she remnded me today on my wall about the importance of checking my stools for blood since I have diaherria.
how did we ever eat at restaurants where they DIDNT squirt-gun tequila in our mouths?
She said she wanted to have closure sex.
im seconds away from chugging that vodka and preforming the surgery on myself.
Sorry we're taking so long, this weed cake tastes amazing with Tabasco sauce on it.
She makes walking on a treadmill look like a porno. I wish I could send over shots as an ice breaker.
That's effing brilliant. We should start a business.
I really hope your new roommate never finds out we had a threesome with a bisexual British guy in his room the night before he moved in.
MIDGETS
????
Well, we ended up labeling the relationship. We are now each other's designated butt-toucher.
Dude, fate has brought her to your penis.
Because talking after sexting is equivalent to cuddling after sex
Until you've snorted cocaine at 6am before your nursing school clinicals birthing babies you're not on my level
Randomize