Apparently he always goes for the wrong girl so it should be easy for me to nail him.
So at what point do I tell her that I like fucking these hot southern girls more than I like my relationship with her?
i'm going to look back at this as the time of my life when i casually dated that autistic guy
Chasing tequila with honey. Ill let you know how it turns out.
Omg considering I am covered in cake and probably cocaine that is the greatest news I have ever heard
Have invented new cocktail. Any flavor of crystal light and vodka. I call it "I am going to die alone"
How can I not totally like a guy that told me my boobs were too big for me to be taught how to play golf?
No, not normal drunk. Wake up on a trampoline with a naked chick you've never seen before drunk. I think i missed my first trampoline sex...
Well at one point he got ahold of my archery gear.. And I. Shit. You. Not. Sarah took an arrow to the knee.
I am going to dream of scrotums tonight, I just know it.
I'm at a bar where I literally walked in to the bathroom and some chick told me to never go to San Joaquin state pen
Is selling savings bonds for acid money something a normal person does?
I can't tell if this is a hangover or just a perfect combination of shame and regret
Apparently I gave a guy a hand job on the dance floor. ON THE DANCE FLOOR.
she bought my drinks all night, made me breakfast in the morning, and let me use her expensive hair products before i left. best one night stand ever.
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