I woke up this morning in your mom's car... any ideas?
Whoa Z and x make the same sound
it's like i warped into dreamland and the only thing that makes sense is my solo cup
We were tigers and tigers don't wear pants
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My roommate just did the walk of shame in last nights corset back to our room to find her dad there. THATS why i go to school out of state.
What's the protocol when you drive the girl's head into the wall during sex and she starts to cry?
I'm really sorry I gave you road head last night and made you drive over and break the sprinkler system.
We had a pillow fight. It looks like an angel exploded here. A DRUNK ALCOHOLIC ANGEL
My love will cover her like lulu lemon yoga pants. Casually supportive and always complimenting your Ass.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She gave me what I will now dub a "hurricane sandy". Loud, wet and sloppy BJ that made me want to stay home and complain about shit on the Internet
If I could run through a field of Reece's and Oreos, dive off a milkfall into a bowl of cereal. My Life would complete.
I'm studying. And by studying I mean I am laying on my floor drinking boones farm alone. Last two weeks. Fuck it.
All I'm saying is there better be a bow on your dick for my birthday
Slept on the bathroom floor again. I hope when I turn 28 I’ll stop doing that
Wow this just keeps getting better, weed, shrooms, a stripper..........a gun.
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